“Not caring about things since 1971, so that you don’t have to.”
Grow the fuck up already.
6. Ray Rice’s apology, Jonah Hill’s apology, Steven A. Smith’s apology, Gary Oldman’s apology
We’re sorry, but yawn.
The empty storefronts. The Soviet-era mats. Kettle bells, sweat, and that guy who just won’t stop talking about it.
4. Eric Cantor’s next move
Lobbyist? Hedgefunder? Fox pundit? Two years of vital public service leveraged into a vast pile of dragon’s gold.
3. The Bachelorette
Ruining our Twitter feed every Monday. And cerebellum Sunday nights.
2. What Khloe Kardashian thinks about Adrienne Bailon
Her 15 minutes were up a day and fourteen minutes ago.
Unfortunately, it’s not porn.