Author Archives: Helena Baptiste

About Helena Baptiste

Helena Baptiste is a former madam of MaLo's International House of Ho, an infamous but quaint, small-town Louisiana brothel masquerading as a Chinese restaurant. Amidst trumped-up charges from local law enforcement due to her refusal to offer complimentary doughnuts while you wait (No doughnut! Only fortune cookie!) and increasing threats from local gangsters for her grandmother's notorious Cathouse Jambalaya Love Spell recipe rumored to be the secret to her success, Baptiste escaped to the Midwest where she is now working on a collection of poetry, "The Way My Fingers Smell" and her memoir, "Mama Sure Effed Me Up" while living in constant fear of being sacrificed to the corn. Her motto is "You can keep me up here all day, but I got secrets I ain't tellin'!"